Remember a time you felt pretty…

After a full day of branding Stacey was getting them ready for their photo shoot the next day.  She was going through a list of feelings they could access and lean into during their photo shoot.  She was doing a brilliant job of bringing up emotions and memories for them to embody during their photo shoot.  There was laughter in the air as stories were exchanged.  One of the gals said play “Walking On Sunshine” and that will get me there.  Next Stacey instructed:“I want you to remember a time you felt pretty”.

HideFaceThe room felt flat. The women’s faces contorted in what looked like pain in attempting to remember a time they felt “pretty”.  Stacey could see the struggle and was stumped.

Here I am sitting in a room full of beautiful, talented and engaging business women.  Women whom I look up to and admire.  Women who are strong and feminine and beautiful.  Women who I know are changing the world with their work. Women who are very pretty.

I felt a moment of sadness as I saw the pain and confusion in their faces connected to the word “pretty”.  Neither one of them resonated with the word “pretty”.  I was witness to their uncomfortableness and jumped in….

What about a time you felt attractive?  Or beautiful?

Or what about a time you felt really good about the way you looked?

What about a time your husband told you you look pretty or beautiful?

Something in the words I said sparked some memories and both women accessed a time they could embrace in their photo shoot.  Neither woman resonated to the word “pretty”.

It got me thinking about this word and what does it really mean? What does it mean to feel pretty? What does pretty look like? What does being ‘pretty’ feel like?  Is it OK to feel pretty? Why was it so hard for them to remember a time they felt pretty?  Do I remember a time I felt pretty?

 

I remember a whole lot more times that I felt ugly than I felt pretty.  That is sad.Ugly

 

There are so many pressures on women to look good but I’m beginning to realize that there are so many women who are beautiful but they don’t know it, they don’t feel it.  They have no idea that they are pretty.  I’m not sure there is an answer to this except I want women to know and feel pretty & beautiful.  I want a place to be vulnerable, to share and to encourage. I want to talk about what we are not talking about.

 

In a beautifully manifested conversation a Facebook Group was birthed “Pretty Girls Who Feel Ugly”.

Pretty1Pretty Girls Who Feel Ugly was created for powerful, beautiful, heart centered women who don’t know they are beautiful.  Not knowing something amazing about yourself shows up in many different ways.  It’s never just about looks or being pretty.  When you are discounting yourself you are dismissing things that are of high value for yourself.

So let’s open up a discussion and share and talk and be vulnerable.

What does pretty look like?

What is pretty supposed to feel like?

You’re so pretty, why are single?

Are you supposed to know you are pretty?

Where does beauty really come from?

I want to share my vulnerability with you and I want you to do the same.

Every women should have a time in her life that she feels pretty, that she feels beautiful and that she knows she matters.

 

Please join us and invite the amazing women in your life.

Much love to you,

Melissa

PS Join us for an open hearted conversation… Pretty Girls Who Feel Ugly

A time for goodbye and “get on with it”…

GrandmaThe last week of January was a special one for me. I aired my very last episode of Raving Fan Radio and flew to Portland, OR to say my last goodbye to my Grandma Do who passed the week before.

Grandma Do was 90 years old and lived a very long and wonderful life. I was able to say my last goodbye to her in person over the Christmas holiday and then my final farewell to her with my loving family in arms. Death always makes me examine my own life and take a good hard look, I ask myself…

IMG_5492   

    What do I really want to do in life?
    Who am I, really?
    What am I afraid of?
    How do I want to look back on my life when I die?

 

 

I ask these on the literal front and also on the spiritual, higher power path.  So often we are afraid to truly pursue our dreams, be who we are meant to be and stand in our power.  I’ve seen myself go through this.   Grandma Do’s services where special because there was a phrase that was shared during the services and it was one that I had not heard her say.

She wanted us, her loved ones, her family to say our goodbyes and then:

Get on with in…

I thought this was very fitting for such a beautiful, loving and strong woman. In her last words to us she shared “get on with it” for she would not want us to wallow in sorrow or stay stuck in the sadness of her passing for too long. She would want us to “get on with it” and to move forward with our lives and truly LIVE them.

Do_BobThat’s how Grandma Do lived her life. A loving wife to Grandpa Bob, a mother to 6, a mother-in-law to many, a grandmother to 11 (of us crazy kids), a great grandmother to 17 and a great-great grandmother to 1.

You see she did it how you are supposed to do it! She came, she LIVED, she was happy, she had children and they had children… Grandma Do & Grandpa Bob left a HUGE family, a beautiful legacy and then they both transitioned to the after life in their 90’s… to me when I look at life, that is the way it is supposed to be.

Her words of “get on with it” touched me so deeply because often when something ends there is a sadness that evolves and yet when one door closes another one always opens. Every decision comes with new opportunities, some good, some bad187… it’s really all how you look at it.

Since the theme of last week was goodbyes, I shed my tears and said my goodbyes to my grandmother, I shared my heart with my Raving Fan Radio listeners and decided to GET ON WITH IT….

For me the decision is to move forward in a more public way and to share my dreams, my hopes, my desires, my win’s, my losses, my learnings with you… my raving fans… in a more endearing & vulnerable way. My “get on with it” is moving forward to a YouTube channel where I will share with you personal insights. You can view my first YouTube video of Melissa TV here.

I invite you to share what you are aiming for in 2015 and what is it that you need to “get on with it”….. what is your GET ON WITH IT?

To love and light to Grandma Do…

“Although it’s difficult today to see beyond the sorrow,

May looking back in memory help comfort you tomorrow.”

Many blessings!
Melissa